Down, & winding up

My mood is waaaay down, & my mind is starting to spin. How long was he fucking lying to me? Why did he bother giving me a ring just to drop me on my fucking ass? When & why did he stop giving a fuck about us? Selfish, lazy, piece of fucking shit. He said he still loves me, & cares about me. Bull fucking shit. I’m worthless trash that people just throw off to the side when they’re fucking done using me. I’m weak. My life just keeps kicking me in the face. I’m alone. With way too much on my shoulders. It’s all so worthless. I can’t wait to die. I’m really struggling not to cut myself. I want to sooo fucking bad. Just once, just to get it over with. Cuz fuck me, & my shitty existence. No point in trying. Everything just goes to shit anyway.

I don’t think I have enough time for worksheets with all these shitty beliefs rotting my mind…

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