Down down down

My mood & ambition are winding down. I just wanna lay in bed all day. (Ex)Hubby hurt my feelings, so I need to do a worksheet when I’m done writing this part, hahaha. He’s supposed to check in with me every day, but he didn’t yesterday. Then he woke me up this morning with a text saying he was having trouble logging in to the car insurance. I must’ve copied the password down wrong; one too many letters. That was all he wanted. Doesn’t give a fuck how I’m doing anymore. Probably too busy fucking his dumb whore.

Another thing that’s pissing me off is that the chick I used to work with, who I asked to help my father out, seems to have flaked out on me. Funny, I reach out for fucking help, yet I’m still trying to do every fucking thing myself. How discouraging. And depressing.

(“One Belief“)

  • Nobody gives a fuck.
  • I feel alone. And overwhelmed. Scared & sad. I just wanna not care anymore. I wanna isolate myself even more, so I don’t burden anyone. I wanna just lie in bed until everything goes away.
  • Without this thought, I am someone who gets shit done. For myself, by myself. I am confident, strong, & independent.
  • Everybody gives a fuck. People offer to help more than they’re capable of. People need to take care of themselves, in order to be able to help others. I’ve had a few offers of help.

Well, that helped a little bit…

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